HEHHHHHHHLO.

Firstly, Happy 14th birthday to EstherSTEADSTEAD!♥
Enjoy your birthday! :D
You're so loved (:

Alrights. Today is goddamn boring.
I've no idea what to do, seriously.
&&, feeling kinda frustrated for the past few hours.

So pissed off.
So moody.
So upset.
So frustrated.
I feel so like crying my heart out.
Can i ? But, it wont gurantee i'll feel better after that.
I dont know what i should do now, seriously.

I know that O level is important. Did i even say it's not?
I know i've not been taking any of my exams seriously.
I know i've been failing throughout, flunking almost ALL my papers.
I know i've not been studying, revising any of my works.
I know i've been using the comp all day long, wasting my time.
I know i've not been heeding any of your advices all along.
I KNOW , I KNOW , I KNOW!

How do you encourage people to study hard?
By provoking? By looking down on them? By spamming negatives stuffs?
Is that the right way of encouraging? Fyi to me, it's NO.
What's that suppose to mean when cursing own child to fail?
I dont get any encouragement from all these.
I've got something from it, whatelse other than DISCOURAGEMENT.

If what you gave are something that's much more pleasant,
it might have a different outcome. Who knows?
But one thing for sure, by saying negative stuffs,
it'll make me feel to give up on studies even more.
It's my feeling, on myself.
Not yours, of course you wouldnt know it much better than i do.
Even though you're my mother or whoever.

You guys are my own family members.
My Father, My Mother, My Brother.
Couldnt i just get some encouragement from you guys?
At the very least, it'll just cheered me up to study.
The feeling of being looked down by own family members,
totally sucks, totally hurts.

I dont know what to say, what to do.
I know i've put in effort, that's enough.
You guys didnt see my effots, that's your problem.
I'm not gonna care anymore.
I only know that, i've started to panicked for the O's since February.
Do you even know? Hah, i dont think so.

I did worried, panicked, afraid of the upcoming O levels.
Oh whatever. None of you will even believes me.
Who cares. I know it myself, it's enough.

Crapps. I gives up.
Not on studying, but on trust.
For goodness sake, just stop hurting me.
I'm weak, i'm emotional, i cries easily.
Stop forcing me, i'll break down one day if this continues.
Please..

Shall go off now. Fucking upset.
I'll reply tags tomorrow, sorry people.
I've to cheer up! Cheer me up anyone?
D: , D: , D: , D: , D: , D: , D: , D: , D: !

Baby, 915 words to go!♥
iloveyoutotheverymax (:

Ciaos.