Hello wello,

I finally, at last after so long, decided to log-in to my blogger account.
Sorry for not replying to all those tags and not blogging.
Wasn't really in the right state of mind for the past one whole month.
Yeah, breaking up with boyfriend was never a good thing.
It'll just directly breaks me down, to the maximum.
Even resorting to being damn emotional and shuts me off from everything.

Yep, just because of such huge attack,
I stopped going to my night class, for a month.
Laughs. That's real dumb, I know.

Anyway, I ain't feeling any where better even till now.
Everyday I've to face the guy I once loved so deeply with.
The guy I once said so many times of "I love you" to.
It's really a awkward feeling! :(

I'm trying so fucking hard to go forget about everything.
It's like asking me to end my own life, needs so much courage.
Sighs, really really difficult to let go.

I still don't know why, why I can't even forget him even till now.
Like seriously, I've no idea at all.
Always been telling myself to forget about him, but end up I always fail to do so.
Sometimes really pissed off with myself.

I know I'm letting my friends down by doing so.
But please forgive me, I'm really having a hard time to control my own feelings, mind and heart.
Whenever I'm at school, I will think of him, because school been the place I know him.
Whenever I'm at home, I will think of him, because I can never get texts from him.
Whenever I'm in mrt, I will think of him, because mrt was the place where I get to hug him so tightly.
Whenever I'm on bus, I will think of him, because bus was the place where he insists I put on safety belt.
Whenever I'm at orchard, I will think of him, because it's the place where we both walked around for 8hours.
Whenever I'm in cinema, I will think of him, because I miss the moment in there with him.
Whenever I'm on the street, I will think of him, because I will never fail to see the word Eunos.
Whenever I'm using the comp, I will think of him, because of facebook.
Whenever I'm using facebook, I will think of him, because we used to play interviews.
There's many more.. I can never finish listing them out.
Just in conclusion, whatever I do, wherever I go, I will just thinks of him.

Please, just help me get out of this illusion.
I'm really suffering, or maybe not suffering.
Just that, being stucked in the world full of him.
I don't know how to explain the feeling.
Sometimes it's nice, sometimes it's terrible.

Oh wells.
Anyway, exams just finished yesterday.
Effective communication paper - Easy peasy.
Introduction to baking science paper - Difficult like fuck.
Pastry basics paper - Still manageable.
Cake mixing and baking paper - Manageable, only dies on one question.

Well, I did studied for this exam.
I really hope I could pass them all.
Cause I definitely have no interest in retaking any of the module at all.

Talking abour retaking, I'm really regretting on retaking my O levels.
Practically a waste of time, fuck it.
I'm already giving up on them, Maths & Science.
Only pinning hopes on English, Chinese & Combine Humanities.
Gonna study for them the next few weeks.
Fuck, O levels are like less than a month's time.
Sighs. Jiayou.

Alrights.
I shall stop here, cause I'm using phone to blog.
Blogging at a basketball court at yewtee, even nice.
Hahaha. Heading to grandma house for lantern later on (;
Shall go enjoy burning of candles and playing of fire. Hehe.
Tags will be replied soon, I promise, when I use a comp to visits mu blog.
Goodnights, Goodbye. <:

Girl ah,
You can don't see them, but you chose to.
I never force you to see it anyway (:
Laughs, just lead your own life if you want and I won't say anything.
You were the one who gave me a chance to do so -.-
Haha, so what if you calls me a bitch before? I dont even bother.

Oh. You not happy?
Come straight to me, don't hide behind and badmouth me (:
Please dont always gossip behind people's back ._.
Cause it's really irritating to others you know.
Come to think of it yourself, how will you feel if I were to do that? :/
Bad isn't it? You wouldn't like it if someone were to gossip about you behind..
Yeah, so please like seriously, don't do that again.. :(

No matter what, I also know you for so fucking long, almost 8years
Can just take it as I know what you're thinking (:
But yeah, frankly speaking, it's the fact that I can't bear to not befriends you..
Cause afterall you were really once close to me (':
I know misunderstanding you had, can be cleared up lah.
But only if you want. I will. (:

---

Oh yeah, grats for me.
I've let go of it (:
I'm really happy, truly I am.
Laughs :D

Yup.
Friends always, forever you and they will be!
Normal friends are also called friends (:
Who cares if I ain't close to you all anymore,
Because at least we're still friends, better tham strangers.
Hahahahahhs, there's always a way when there's a will (:
So anyway, friends (Y) !

Ciaos.

`I realised I don't need it, I'm happy now :D

♥ I always failed in the game called, Love.


HELLO.

I don't like to see you being that way, because it just breaks my heart even more.
I'll even be more heartache and upset when I sees you being so pessimistic.
You know truly well I'll always be there for you no matter what it takes.
Even though we aren't together any longer, I'll definitely still be there.
Even if the whole world hates you, I'll still be the one loving you still.
Even if the whole world pulls you down, I'll still be the one getting you back up.
Even if the whole world doesn't care about you, I'll still be the one caring always.
Just remember, there'll always be that someone behind secretly supporting you aye (:

Sighs.
Yesterday really such a torturing day can.
By right I already somehow woke up in the morning 8am plus, though I slept at 3, 4am..
But I'm really so reluctant to get myself awake.
& so I slept back in, till I woke up and check time on my phone and saw, 11:11am.
It just makes me sighs the first thing I saw it, like really a huge sigh to myself.
& yeah, I forced myself to sleep back again, till again, 1:11pm. It's like wtf ):
I don't know why I kept on seeing that few numbers, particular time. 11:11 / 1:11 ..
Seriously, I ain't joking, but really the fact that I kept on seeing them nowadays.
Yeah so, I sighed to myself again, & went back to sleep, again..
So end up, I slept till 2pm, finally decided to wake up.

The reason why I kept on forcing myself to sleep & not wake up,
is because I seriously just wants to escape from reality ):
I don't wish to face today alone, it's really a heart-wrenching truth,
that I've to face and get pass today alone, myself, instead of with you.
Sighs.

Ciaos.

`I miss you, seriously.