♥The only reason for my love being so strong, is you.



Yesterday wasn't really a good day for me, it's just a very very fucked up day. Because it's the day whereby I got hurt by someone's word so so so deeply, yeah and I meant real fucking deep. He'll never know how hurtful are all those words to me, gosh.

Insomnia strikes me again and again, always staying up till so late, or worst still, didn't really even slept! Fuck this shit, it's annoying max for being unable to sleep when you're real tired! Crap.

You told me, love isn't about comparing who with who. Different girl different love. Well boy, in case you didn't know, I know this logic much better than you. Cus I'll never ever ever ever ever fucking mention about other guy infront of the one I love, never ever ever ever ever say "He willing to sacrifice for me, but you won't". NO WAY, I will never even say such thing to someone I love. Cause it's gonna hurt like fuck!

I guess you never even realise all those you told me are extremely hurtful max. By telling me, she would do anything for you even if she would get beaten up by her dad. Right after I said I can't. It's like, you turned one big round just to tell me she's better than me. Laughs, hurt right deep down. :)

K, everyone helping you to put in good words about you to me. But of course, some people are spamming me bad stuffs about you to me too. Whether which I want to listen, I don't give a fuck. Cause I'm already in a dilemma shit myself. A part of me, telling me you're worth waiting for and worth my being nice to. Yet another part of me, telling me you're fucking not worth my love and time. What's this siaaas?! It's like I'm really having the cute little "devil and angel" souls beside me psychoing me all about you -.-

But yaaaa, even if I've made up my mind, I'll keep that decision with myself. I won't tell you if I'm giving up on you, neither will I tell you I'm gonna hang on to you. Just wait and see for yourself, I've no comments anymore. :)

Wait, the problem is, you're NOT even my boyfriend at all sia. That's the funny thing, LOL. What a joke, I'm the joker here. Laughs. Simple, leave it to fate. As I already told you :

"What's yours will definitely be yours. No matter how hard you try, no matter how long you wait, if it's not yours, it'll never ever be. It takes two hands to clap, if one side decided to stop continue clapping with the other one day, the gap between will be bigger and bigger, by then everything will just ends eventually. It's just a matter of time."

My words, take it or leave it, up to you to decide. All I know is, whatever I say are for your own good. I just fucking want you to be happy, that's all. You're a buddhist who worships so many gods, and you believe in all those fortune life stuffs so much, so the more you should know better than me about that thing called, fate and life. :)

I said my piece, I never slept yesterday, only slept a few hours in the morning today and off to helped parents tend shop. I'm fucking tired out, just because of you. Smart me! :)

I pray hard I won't get insomnia tonight AGAIN, I'm sick of it :(

`You're not sorry.